FNP: WASHINGTON POST HOSTS MOGUL MARCH

Faux News Press (FNP)_Washington, DC:

FNP has learned that Donald Graham and Catharine Weymouth will host this years "March of the Moguls" under the banner of The Washington Post. This event has become an annual parade showcasing America's leading plutocrats.

The parade will begin at the home of The Washington Post, which is located in a building at 15th & L Streets, NW, Washington, D.C. From there it will proceed southward past the U.S. Treasury building. As the paraders proceed past this building, they will pause to hear a few words of welcome from President Obama and Secretary Tim Geithner.

According to sources high in the Obama Administration, each mogul will receive a $20 Double Eagle gold coin in mint condition as a gesture of "thanks" for all they have done for America. Due to unexpected hardship, Bernie Madoff will receive ten gold coins for services provided in past years.

After this presentation, the moguls will continue their march to the west lawn of the U.S. Capitol. They will be met by a combined assemblage of Senators and Representatives, who will listen respectfully as the moguls sing: "God Gave This Land To We."

After this exuberant songfest, the moguls will be treated to canapes and cocktails. Parked discreetly to the side of the Capitol grounds, scores of limousines will await the weary but merry moguls.

The parade will be led by Donald Graham, Warren Buffet and Catharine Weymouth. Following this trio will be: Walter Shorenstein (San Francisco), Richard Swig (San Francisco), Scott Seligman (Michigan), Martin Selig (Seattle), Jack Benaroya (Seattle), Arthur Cohen (Arlen Realty...), a Samuel J. Lefrak family representative (N.Y.C.), representatives of the Uris, Durst, Tishman, Rudin, Horowitz, Ravitch, Minskoff, Milstein families (N.Y.C.), Sol Goldman and Frederic Rose family representatives (N.Y.C.), Aaron Gural, Leo and Alexander Bing, the Reznicks, Fishers, Koeppels, Wiens, Cohens and Silverstein family representatives (N.Y.C.), Steven Gaines (The Hamptons), Ben Tobin, Jack Weiler, Frederic and Earle Mack (N.Y./N.J.), Aaron Ziegelman (N.Y.C.), Jerry Speyer, Bernard Mendik (N.Y.C.), Steven Green (N.Y.C.), Albert M. Greenfield (Philadelphia), the Hellman family (Los Angeles), the Sam Zell family (Chicago), Neil Bluhm, Judd Malkin, Philip Klutznik (Chicago), Robert Smith (D.C.), Robert Kogod (D.C.) the Haft family representative (D.C.), Mort Zuckerman (D.C.), Albert Abramson (D.C.), Ted Lerner (D.C.), Bernard and Carol Gewirz(D.C.), Robert Rosenthal (D.C.), Estelle Gelman (D.C.), Hermen Greenberg (D.C.), representatives of the Abe Polin family (D.C.), Myer and Adrienne Arsht Feldman (D.C.), Joel Meisel (D.C.), Barry Cohen (D.C.), Jerry Moore (Houston), David Mincberg (Houston), Laurence Hirsch (CEO of Centex), a representative of the Mark Goldweitz family (Boston), Jerome Rappaport (Boston), the Krupp family representative (Boston), Stephen Karp (Boston), Julian Cohen (D.C.), Bruce Beal (Boston), Steve Fishman (Boston), Ron Drucker (Boston), Dick Friedman (Boston), Alan Leventhal (Boston), Edwin Sidman (Boston), the representative of the Simon Konover family (N.E.), Richard Penzer (Pittsburgh), William Adler (Chicago), Jona Goldrich (L.A.), Abraham Lurie (L.A.),Mark Nathanson (L.A.), Craig Robins (Miami), Tony Goldman (N.Y.), John Price (Utah), Sally Barry (Denver), Jordan Perlmutter (Denver), Shaul Baruch (Denver), Phil and Harley Schrager (Omaha), Mort Friedman (Sacramento), Sheldon Solow (N.Y.C.), David Steiner (N.Y.C.), and many Canadian families, such as the Bronfman, Reichman, Munk, Mernick and Belzberg, who control vast properties in America, will send representatives. There are many other prominent moguls - not listed here - who will attend.

Donald Graham was overheard gloating about the march at a recent dinner with Emil and Warren at The Boss Lady. This posh restaurant in Georgetown, named after Katherine Meyer Graham, has become the spot for real power in America and in the world to have a "square meal" of pricey dishes, while plotting such things as control of Brazilian real estate. No wonder "regular" people can't get a seat at it.

Not to worry! FNP has many eyes that are happy to share the news about what they see.