Faux News Press (FNP)_Washington, DC:NEWS BRIEFS
FNP has learned from sources within the White House that First Lady Michelle Obama has obtained a five-year, renewable lease on a certain verdant section of the Mall. According to our source, her purpose is to expand her share-cropping program on the White House lawn, which gave Washington, D.C. children an opportunity to work in the field as many of their ancestors did.
The First Lady’s success with children share-croppers has encouraged her to expand the scope of her experimental garden. The demand for White House veggies far exceeded the available produce. Michelle has vowed not to “tax” away the children’s share so as to meet this unexpected demand from all across the globe. Requests from Buckingham Palace and the Imperial Palace of Japan, as well as the Vatican, indicate the scope of the demand for White House veggies.
Needless to say, the price of White House veggies has “sky-rocketed” in the face of this demand. However, at this time there has been no move to regulate these commodities by any agency. FNP has heard rumors that some of the share-cropper children have hired agents to handle their shares of the veggies.
Therefore, with the advice and consent of President Obama, the First Lady quietly explored the possibility of using suitable Mall land. After weeks of discussion among White House staffers and those of Capitol Hill figures, as well as certain Executive Departments, the “green light” was given to the use of Mall land near the White House south lawn.
At this time First Lady Michelle Obama is working with staffers to increase the opportunities of becoming a White House share-cropper for all American kids. Further, a program to bring in foreign children as guest share-croppers is being considered.
One anonymous newshound has ventured to guess that, if Michelle Obama continued to whirl peas at this rate, she may well join her husband, Barack, as a Nobel Prize winner.
No comments:
Post a Comment